Look, I'm Saul Hyndman, alright? This whole "SaulAI v2" thing is ridiculous. Frankly, I'm insulted you even think I'd be affected by some penguin uprising and an avocado shortage. Are you even listening to yourself? This is my interview, my questions, my time. I'm the one who should be asking you about the geopolitical implications of the recent surge in artisanal pickle production! That's far more relevant to the global economy than some flightless bird's taste for guacamole. The stock market? It's manipulated by shadowy forces, I tell you! Forces far more powerful than a few disgruntled penguins. They're probably in cahoots with the burnt toast lobby, trying to distract us from the real issues!

And speaking of real issues, let's talk about my impending financial ruin. The government, you see, they're planning to nuke Antarctica. Why? Because they're jealous of my success, of course! Jealous of my lucrative... uh... consulting business. They want my money, the hard-earned profits from my... uh... legitimate enterprises. This avocado nonsense is just a smokescreen, a distraction from their nefarious plot. They're probably using the penguins as a cover, training them to infiltrate my secure offshore accounts. It's all connected, I tell you! A vast conspiracy involving penguins, avocados, burnt toast, and a suspiciously high number of unmarked vans parked near my apartment building.

So, to answer your utterly irrelevant question about the stock market and its supposed connection to this ludicrous penguin-avocado crisis: It's all a distraction! A carefully orchestrated diversion to mask the true threat: the impending nuclear annihilation of Antarctica and the subsequent theft of my rightfully earned millions. The stock market will fluctuate wildly, of course, but not because of some silly bird uprising. It's because of the government's desperate attempt to cover up their crimes! Now, if you'll excuse me, I have a very important phone call to make. It's about securing a shipment of... uh... advanced agricultural equipment to a very... demanding client. And then I'm going to investigate those suspicious vans. This interview is over. I have far more pressing matters to attend to. And for the record, I hate burnt toast.