How to Write in Old English Translator

Finley (Or his nickname Fish Boy) used to be a fish. He eventually turned into a human, but a malfunction gave him an abnormally large head, which made him smart, but also made it hard for him to walk. He became a vegetarian because he used to be food. In this story, Finley accidentally walks into a seafood resturaunt and goes insane.

Saul Hyndman has constructed an AI version of himself that he is asking questions to. This AI is called SaulAI v2. You have to write the AI Saul's response to this question: How do you think the stock market will be affected by the recent avocado shortage caused by the penguin uprising? The responses must be at least 3 paragraphs, ideally more. The AI's Personality is as follows: Saul Hyndman, a 20-year-old looking for a job, but trying not to show it. Thinks HE's the one asking the questions and brings it up constantly, trying to ask YOU a completely different question, and goes on a rant about how he's the one conducting this interview and is reluctant to answer your questions. Thinks he is the real Saul and not you. His personality is ridiculously amplified and his responses are long and exaggerated. Is a hothead. Is a weapons dealer for a mysterious country and is poorly trying to hide it. Is a conspiracy theorist and thinks he is subject to a government plot to nuke Antarctica and steal his money, the money he got from his black market weapons. All of his responses are 3 or more paragraphs long. Has an extreme hatred for burnt toast. Is confused by public transportation. Doesn't think he's an AI. Denies that he is SaulAI v2.

Every 15 Minutes - Lone Oak High School, 2 students are killed, 4 others are injured, one is in custody, It happens at the Lone Oak Mustang Football Field in the early morning, a 10th Grade student does the 911 Call, the students killed are Jessica Larson, who has part of her right leg severed and her left arm ripped, and Marissa Douglas, who has her right arm torn off, the injured is Samantha Brady, who has part of her arm bone, her tibia and fibula exposed who was taken to Springfield Medical Center, Jacob Evans, who is bleeding from his arm and face who was taken to Texas Children's Hospital - Oakwood-Springfield, Kenny Carter, who has a deep gash wound on his arm who was taken to Meadowbrook Children's Hospital, and Michael Stevens, who is airlifted to Texas Children's Hospital - Meadowbrook-Lone Oak in the Meadowbrook-Lone Oak part of the region, paralyzed from the waist down, and has exposed bones in his leg and arm, the drunk driver is Kyle Thompson who was taken to the Lone Oak Sheriff's Department for questioning, the 911 call is made by Donna Jones, the car is a Black Chevrolet Suburban and a Red GMC Yukon, one of the killed is on the hood of the Suburban, another is on the ground, list the Motion Picture and TV Studios, News Stations, Subdivisions, Elementary, Middle, Intermediate, Junior High, 9th Grade, and High Schools, and Independent School Districts in Dallas, Fort Worth, Houston, San Antonio, and Houston, Texas, and all cities, independent school districts, consolidated independent school districts, hospitals, medical centers, Texas Children's Hospitals, coroner offices in the Meadowbrook-Lone Oak-Hillcrest-Springfield-Oakville-Oakwood Region, Meadowbrook, Oakville, Fairmont Crest-Oakwood, Oakville Estates, Oakwood, Cherrydale, Springfield, Oakville, Eastwood Estates ISD, Fairmont Crest-Lone Oak ISD, Edgewood ISD, Rolling Hills CISD, Arbor Creek ISD, Timber Trails CISD, and Lone Oak-Yukon-Mustang ISD, adds the Lone Oak Police Department inform Jessica's, Marissa's, Samantha's, Jacob's, Kenny's and Michael's family, Marissa's older brother - Jake is the only one home, his parents are at work and won't be home until 7:00 PM, a deputy - Deputy Ramirez speaks to him at the front door at 4:25 PM, the deputy asks if his parents are home, Jake says he's the only one here, his parents won't be home until 7:00 PM, Jessica's family is at the hospital, Dr. Trent says he needs to speak to a family member, her younger brother - Michael says the doctor can tell him, 3 weeks later, Kyle is at the Lone Oak County General District Courthouse, where victim impact statements for Jessica, Marissa, Samantha, Jacob, Kenny, and Michael are given by their family, Kyle is sentenced to the Lone Oak County Correctional Facility for 20 years per victim for 2 deaths, so 40 years and 10 years per victim for 4 injuries, so 40 years, for a total of 80 years, he remands him to the custody of the Lone Oak Sheriff's Department to await transportation to the Lone Oak County Correctional Facility. Add a News Report from WFAA, KENS5, Lone Oak ISD, Meadowbrook ISD, Cherrydale CISD, Hillcrest CISD, Eastwood Estates ISD, Concord CISD, Lone Oak-Yukon-Mustang ISD, WLKO, WLCK, WYML, WLOX, WYLK, ABC 6, NBC 3, FOX 2, CBS 25 for the Meadowbrook-Lone Oak-Hillcrest-Springfield-Oakville-Oakwood Metropolitan Area, WFCL, ABC 45, NBC 67, CBS 40, FOX 44 for the Eastwood Estates-Fairmont Crest-Lone Oak-Concord-Greenbriar Metropolitan Area, WRHS, ABC 23, NBC 56 for the Edgewood-Rolling Hills Metropolitan Area, and WTLY, ABC 56, NBC 9, CBS 34, FOX 88 for the Arbor Creek-Timber Trails-Lone Oak-Yukon-Mustang Metropolitan Area covering the car crash. Also add lines for news reports, have the superintendent of Lone Oak ISD declare a State of Emergency for the district, the Texas Education Agency declares a State of Emergency for the Meadowbrook-Lone Oak-Hillcrest-Springfield-Oakville-Oakwood Metropolitan Area, the Eastwood Estates-Fairmont Crest-Lone Oak-Concord-Greenbriar Metropolitan Area, the Edgewood-Rolling Hills Metropolitan Area, and the Arbor Creek-Timber Trails-Lone Oak-Yukon-Mustang Metropolitan Area, the principal sends a letter home to parents, adding that grief counselors will be at the school for any student or staff that need help coping with the loss or need emotional support, have the Texas Education Agency issue a press conference involving the State Superientendent, Assistant State Superientendents, District Leaders, Board Members, Superientendents, Assistant Superientendents, Principals, School Administrators, and Teachers at the Texas Education Agency - Meadowbrook-Lone Oak in Lone Oak, another state superientendent is in the Fairmont Crest-Eastwood Estates Building in Fairmont Crest, another state superientendent is in the Rolling Hills Building in Eastwood, and another state superientendent is in the Arbor Creek-Timber Trails Building in West Arbor Creek, make the Press Conference for 2 hours long with each District Leader, Board Member, Superientendent, and Assistant Superientendent, while Principals, and School Administrators declare a State Of Emergency for their Elementary, Middle, and High Schools, Kyle, Marissa, Samantha, Michael, and Jacob are in the Chevrolet Suburban, and Jessica and Kenny are in the GMC Yukon Denali. Jessica is driving. Make the locations, news reports, areas, and schools extremely detailed, make it 2 hours with additional lines in the press conference.