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a utopia without any pain felt

minimalism, a bee, black clouds

What Goes On in Room 218, after class, Lucas was finally going to see what was in there. The fascination was born just last week. On his walk a door, one that was typically closed and thus not on his radar, was open to reveal a brightly colored room with a sign on the door that said Southern California Community College Special Needs Center. That caught his eye, and he needed to know more about it. He couldn’t place what exactly made it so interesting. Maybe it was because it could prove helpful to him, as he was autistic himself. He took a quick second to look inside. It looked like a typical classroom, with desks and chairs and staff. However, unlike the other classrooms at his college, this room was full of plenty of bright colors and foam walls and floors. Currently in the room, several aides were working with students with various mental challenges. Lucas didn’t know what made this so interesting to him. Maybe it was because he felt like he identified with these students, as he was autistic himself. Maybe the center could definitely help out with some of his struggles. Aside from the ways Lucas could benefit from a visit to his center, there was one thing that caught his eye in the room: a guy about his age in a wheelchair with what looked like a transparent purple headset and a bright green face mask attached to a balloon. Lucas had no idea what was going on, but he was captivated. Since that day, he would walk by each day and see if he could see that same guy with the same set-up, and every day, he’s had no luck. However, each day, he worked up more and more courage to walk into that room. Today, he finally found the strength. Once his calculus class was over, he was going to check it out, but he had to be stealthy; he didn’t want anyone asking what he was up to, lest he have to explain his plan. He looked at his watch: 3:10. Class would end in 5 minutes and he could finally check it out, but that was when his professor brought up the final coming up and mentioned all that would be on it. Between all the vocabulary words and all the formulas to memorize, Lucas started to get really anxious thinking about it and even started to feel a panic attack coming on. Once the professor dismissed them, Lucas left the classroom as soon as possible to get some fresh air. He tried not to let himself get too stressed about the exam and made sure he could enjoy his trip to the special needs classroom, but it was hard to calm down As he made his way to cut across the main quad to get to the classroom, he did not account for one major thing: a career fair setting up while Lucas was in class. He was already anxious enough about his final, to be dodging so many people and sounds would have driven him over the edge. His anxiety started to rise more, as he felt himself start to flap his wrist. That was one of his stims, something he did when he got overwhelmed. He reached into his backpack and got his headphones out and put them out and turned his music up. Once his music was on, he could instantly feel himself start to calm down. He made a beeline for the classroom, past all the people, sounds, and occasional smells. Lucas just focused on his music and kept his head down. Once he made it to the classroom, door still open, he looked around to make sure no one was watching, and walked in. Lucas walked in and saw no one was there, or so he thought. That guy in the wheelchair was still there, still with that green mask. What was so interesting about it? Lucas wondered to himself. Lucas thought nothing of it; he’s probably too disabled to care, he thought. He looked around, feeling the soft foam with each step on it. One guy was wearing a football helmet. Given the guy he saw that displayed self-injurious behavior, he saw that as a good deterrent. Like what we’ve done with the place? Lucas, startled, turned around to see a man in a bright red polo shirt and glasses looking at him. Busted. Oh, uh, yeah, it looks really nice, Lucas said, getting very flustered Sorry, I’ll, uh, be out of your way. Oh, no, you’re more than welcome here, the man assured, I’m Brian, one of the aides for the center. Lucas. Nice to meet you, Lucas said, still a bit flustered. Everything okay? Brian asked, his tone turning to concern. Oh, I’m fine, just got a lot of sensory overload coming in between finals and that career fair, Lucas tried to brush off with a chuckle, I’m, uh, actually sort of special needs myself. I’m autistic. This school really isn’t built for the neurodiverse, Brian said, understandingly. Lucas chuckled in response. Lucas was definitely fixated on that apparatus of the mentally disabled man in the wheelchair. That’s Tommy, one of our regulars. Autism and anxiety, so he comes in here to just detach. What’s on his head? Lucas asked, curiosity getting the better of him. It’s for his anxiety and sensory overload, Brian said, slightly interrupted by Tommy gesturing and grunting. Lucas and Brian looked over to see Tommy pointing at Lucas and then pointing to his mask. Tommy, what a good idea! Brian exclaimed, I think he should try it, Try what? His mask! I mean, you seemed to be really interested in it, so why not take it for a test drive. Lucas had so many mixed feelings. It would definitely satisfy his curiosity, but he didn’t know what it was or what to expect. Ummm. Trust me, this will make you feel so much better! Tommy uses it and it really helps when he gets close to meltdowns. B B Ball! Tommy tried to say, muffled under the mask. Oh, yes, the ball! Brian said. Ball? He means balloon. There’s a balloon typically attached that helps as a focal point. Brian wheeled out a chair identical to Tommy’s and searched the bag underneath Tommy’s. Lucas, do you like orange, red, blue, or purple? Purple, please, Lucas said, as Brian took out a purple mask almost identical to Tommy’s Now, Tommy likes baseball so there’s a baseball balloon on the mask for him. I can switch it if you want something else. I have a basketball one, a Batman one, or I just have plain colors. Um, the basketball one seems cool. Brian hooked up the basketball balloon to the mask. Okay, Lucas, it’s ready for you. Go ahead and have a seat. Lucas hesitantly yet sure enough took a seat in the wheelchair. Brian helped buckle him in, bringing a softly-padded harness over his head with some straps around the legs. Tommy’s chair sat right beside him. Brian took Tommy’s green mask off and placed a purple headset on which a nasal hood swiveled down and Brian secured it onto Tommy’s nose. Tommy clearly liked this because he was giggling and flapping his hands. Brian then extended a mask attachment from the headset, along with the basketball balloon jutting out from the front. Brian flipped a switch and the basketball balloon inflated slightly. You ready? Lucas took a deep breath and said ready. Brian placed the mask over Lucas’ nose and mouth. Now, just take deep breaths. You want to see the basketball get bigger. Lucas took some deep breaths and watched the basketball in front of him expand and condense. It was almost hypnotic to watch. Lucas didn’t notice anything at first, but about a minute into it, he started to feel better. Brian noticed a smile creep across Lucas’ face, even with the mask over it. There you go, doesn’t that feel good? Lucas nodded and just kept breathing the gas. Lucas felt so relaxed, so care-free. He didn’t even notice Brian turn up the dial increasing the concentration of the gas. You’re gonna be just like Tommy here, he muttered under his breath. Lucas didn’t hear anything, he just kept blowing up that basketball. As he relaxed more and noticed the gas get stronger, he found it a bit hard to think, or speak. He tried to say something, but he could only moan. Soon enough, he could only moan. Soon enough, he couldn’t even think coherently. Perfect. Brian said. He was just about to turn up the gas for his new mentally challenged student, when he thought he saw a young man looking through, he will be back they always come back.